Thursday, October 25, 2012


     Coping with the death of a loved one is never easy and often feels like an emotional roller coaster.  You may agonize over the unresolved questions, the things you wish you had said, but didn’t.   The feelings of guilt that you could have done more haunt you and your mind is in constant turmoil.  Your emotions take you to places you don’t want to go, deep into your heart and mind where your true feelings are stored.  Some of those feelings say it was time for your loved one to go, but that makes you feel guilty.  Another feeling is that of relief that the heavy burden of responsibility has been lifted from your shoulders.  Those feelings are normal.
      When the final moments come and you are watching your loved one slip away, you can almost see their spirit leave their body as they become lifeless.  The loss is overwhelming, tears flow and the emotional release is uncontrollable.  There is a sudden void in your heart.  The close companionship that you shared as your loved one slowly drifting away is something you will cherish for years to come  Sharing those intimate moments makes losing the a little easier to bear, but in another way it makes it more difficult.  You were so close, sometimes for the the first time, then they are snatched away and you still have so much you wanted to say  It is the most heart wrenching experience you can have in this life.  And yet, yo get through it and life goes on.
     The grieving process begins.  It is important to let those emotions go, to cleanse your body with the tears of sorrow.  Without this release, the emotions fester and create problems for the mind and body.  Death is a tie to let go, to give back to God what he loaned us for a short time.
     The grief you feel will pass in time, but it takes a while to come to teams with death.  For some it is a month or two, for others it takes a year or two more.
     Talking about your feelings helps.  After the funeral friends and relatives gather together to talk about the good times they shared with their loved one.  This experience is so important.  Emotional sharing helps to heal the loss.  While funeral gives closure, the opportunity to grieve with family and friends gives you the chance to share emotions and memories of happier times.
     Talking with your family and friends about the departed is necessary to overcome the grief and regain your composure, so that you can eventually resume your normal life.  And amazingly, life goes on...whether you want it to or not.  Sometimes you feel you would like to freeze time so you won’t have to return to your routine or cope with people, especially those who don’t know of your loss.

1 comment:

  1. A dear friend unexpectedly lost her husband due to the meningitis development from the steroid. I appreciate your comments which I will share with her.