Wednesday, February 15, 2012

More about the end almost

     I went back to my little room to wait for Casey. The relief I felt when I saw my daughter’s face at the door of my little room was overwhelming.  We hugged me tight and the tears came again.  I knew that with her by my side, I could face whatever was coming.  Our granddaughter, Nikki, came with her mother---she wouldn’t stay away.She loved her grandpa.  She started to cry as well, frightened by our tears.
     I took Nikki and Casey back to see Wayne.  He was still unconscious, but Casey and I took his hand and squeezed it.  Casey talked to him and held his hand tight.  Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, his eyes started to open.  He saw me and Casey and tried to talk, but the tube down his throat was pressing on his larynx and he couldn’t make a noise.  We explained to him what had happened and he seemed to calm down a little.  We stayed for a short time and then had to leave.
     Nikki took her great-grandmother out to lunch and Casey and I talked with some friends who had stopped by to see us at the apartment.  After we knew that Wayne was stable, we too, ate some dinner.  My appetite was small, but I hadn’t eaten all day and I knew it would be a long night.
     After we ate, we returned to see him again.  The nurse said his blood pressure was staying up and we could rest easy tonight.  She would call us at the apartment if there was any change.  It was a restless night for all of us.  We finally told my mother about Wayne’s condition, now that we were sure he was stable.
     As I lay on the bed in the overheated apartment, I found it hard to control my emotions.  I wept, my mind full of questions about Wayne’s condition.  What am I going to do?  When I take him home, what will his prognosis be?  Is he going to be functioning?  Will he make it?  I couldn’t bear to be without him.  It’s strange how everything in your life can change in a heartbeat.
     What a dreadful time that was...I don’t want to go through that ever again.  Needless to say, he kept his colostomy, for the time being anyway.  No more anesthetic until he was better able to handle it.
     In times like these, you need family and friends to help you through.  It is too difficult to handle experiences like this alone.  Emotional support is vitally important.  Whether it’s family, friends, or your pastor, you need support.
     There are also many support groups.  Be sure to check with your hospital to find the support you need.  If there is not a support group in your area, start one.  You will find that there are many people in your community who also need help and support.  Your hospital Social Service worker will give you the help you need to get a group started.
                                 Thought for the Day
                     I have been driven many times to my knees by the
                    overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere else to go.
                                                         Abraham Lincoln

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